Missing Mark still, after two years

It has been two years since Mark died - the 17th of September 2008 - and the pain seems to be undimmed. Perhaps the jab is less frequent, but certainly not less intense and it still brings me to tears.

I can't hear the song "Leaning on the Everlasting Arms" without remembering singing it to Mark as he lay there unconscious - and the chorus is especially precious - and it was the last song I sang to him as he began to take his last breaths and before going to call in the rest of the family. I also sang "All to Jesus I Surrender" - and I pray that the combination of those songs broke through to his mind, his heart and that he did make a full surrender before deciding to let go to life. All his much-loved family was there, immediate family, daughters, even ex-wife. Roger had taken that day off - just couldn't take any more, and I know Mark would have understood that - they understood each other so well.

I talk to him often in my heart - I know he is asleep in the grave, but still, in my thoughts he is present and so I talk to him and I apologize to him for treating him with such disdain for so many years, leaving him to carry the burden of his addictions alone. I'm so sorry, Mark. I'm just so sorry.

...... Just had to take this break from knitting to let out some of my feelings.

From ugly sweater to nice hats!

I had knitted a sweater from cotton for myself and didn't realize at the time that I should be using a smaller needle - and the top just didn't look good at all: (it IS pink, by the way!)

And I wore it one last time just to make sure - and finally decided to make it into something else - something that would be more useful! So, the sweater became this:



And then those balls became these - 8 hats for the cancer hospital plus a dish cloth and a small round something, perhaps a coaster?!



It was fun - and I hope they are useful!

Adventure with Dyeing

Wanted to try some dyeing - had some very discolored cotton yarn - bought simply because I felt sorry for it sitting on the shelf at the store for so long, I think. It was bulky. So I thought - why not take this yarn, knit it up into hats for the cancer hospital and then dye? One with tea, one with coffee. Here is how it began:
Had enough yarn for two hats:


One on left is coffee, one on right is tea. They were still wet. Not a lot of difference when they were dry. But it was fun!